The Swine Flu In

Today: Woke up with achy-eyeballs. Coughing. I tried to induce a fever by doing aerobics under my blankets. This did not work, and only made me uncomfortably sweaty, feeling lukewarmly/unsuccessfully feverish. So maybe I don’t have the flu.

My Roommate, Tara, is also sick with coughs + sniffles, so we compared notes. A remark she made about being sick– she said it was interesting . That’s definitely the last thing I think of when I’m sick. When I’m sick, I’m thinking of 1) ME 2)MISERY, and 3)ME. Her reasoning had something to do with realizing what symptoms you were experiencing: chills, hot flashes of fever, congestion…  I really didnt’ agree. I don’t. Agree. I just pack them all together into one filthy mess of gross snotty sickness.

But since we’re already talking about the body…: body-awareness is sharper when you’re sick, because you begin to monitor yourself in terms of “How gross do I feel?”; “Why is my body doing this to me?”; “What isn’t working?”. The sensitivity of your skin as your body aches, for example: the smallest caresses shock you into piteous submissions of “oww… oww… my shirt is hurting me… oww…” *wimper*. At the same time, you lose certain things you’ve taken for granted. Such as the sense of taste and smell. Why is this? Why is it that our sense of touch is sharpened beyond comfort, and the joys of taste and smell become inaccessible? What is the biological reason for this specific structure of misery??? Where can I even find the answers to these questions? I tried online; they don’t talk about the causes of body aches, only descriptions of it as a symptom.

I’m sorry, this shouldn’t be a post. Whatever. Spread the flu love. Misery loves company. Etc.

Love,

Miser-Grace

I’ve totally gotten sick this weekend, and the deathness is encroaching. My UTTER MISERY is slowly but surely enfolding me in its dark, damp arms.Great. This is what it looks like:

My Utter Misery (via planettampon.tumblr)

Sexy, isn’t it? WELL: I won’t blog about it anymore. Falling into Misery is seductive. She’s a slutty one. But I’ll try very hard to avoid her evil artfulness.

So, I finished my Mars Hill project. See it here. Feel free to praise endlessly– or, tear it apart. All comments welcome (although, the former might make my day a little brighter…!). I’ve actually learned quite a bit through making this 2 minute clip– from the tech-y fundamentals of audio editing, to the genuine beliefs of a Christian follower.

I went into it being skeptical (Oh COME ON: it’s too easy– and as I type this, I agree that the excuse is lame to the point of being inexcusable) about the faith, doing exactly what the girl featured in my project said she had difficulty with: those who lumped all wrong-doing Christians with those who wish to do right in the world. The piety of people are subject to critical critique: picking apart practices for hypocrisy, citing the deaths of thousands from the Crusades to– well, today’s political struggle with equal rights and abortion.

So? What gave? Meeting a real girl. Getting to know her. Her charming honesty and kindness opened my eyes a little. Am I a sucker? Not really. I still have a lot of problems with organized religion. But at the same time, I recognize its intrinsic value to Those Who Follow Faithfully.

I had a discussion with a friend– in a cemetery, actually– about religion and its social, institutional, and spiritual values. How I do believe in a kind spirituality: how I believe that people are so astounded by their own capabilities, they’ve created an entire belief to outsource their agency. From the deaths of close ones to the awe of self-discipline and worth, the blame and worthiness have been displaced on this “GOD”: when really, the potential of human beings to <wreck and destroy> or <build and create endless wonders> can be found within themselves.

I understand that in Christianity, this can be seen as blasphemous! and classified as hearsay (see: my blog title)! but many things have been skewed by power, and I believe that the organized structure implemented through centuries of history is a result of the skew. The fact that God is a male and a reflection of man, for example– there are so many human traditions and restraints that this “GOD” figure is trapped by… of course there are the counterexamples, that “God made man in his own image”, etc., but that’s the thing of faith, right? There’s always something… which also proves my point that the elements of faith is endlessly abused in the face of power and propaganda…

But no more. I feel as if everything to be argued about religion has been ironed out and instantly re-wrinkled. If everyone who followed were as pious and kind as the Christian character demanded, the world would be different.

And this is just part of my larger exasperation with people in the world: they need to follow through on what they promise to themselves, to each other. I hate to sound elitist and righteous, though. I’m working on myself every day, and I’m definitely far from perfect.

I'm never tall enough

On the title of this post, though: this entire blog might be a giant knot of tangents.

I’m glad you read it anyway.

Gracious Me

I feel like being sick with the flu is so trippy. Your mind and body are in a completely different state of being. I was either suffocating in my own heat or shivering the bones out of my body.

Anyway, to take minds of (swine) flu and the 70% chance for Precipitation weather…

via lookbook.nu

This guy is serious about his boater shoes. Look how great his legs look in them.

This website is hilarious– basically, kids hipsters all over the world post stylized pictures of themselves in super hip clothing. The titles are what get me. For example, this one

via lookbook.nu

The title of this post is “Tell me Something Sweet to Get Me By”.

And this one:

via lookbook.nu

is called “Juice beats Swine Flu”.

This is why I am in love with blogs.

Gracie