thesartorialist

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thecobrasnake

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coacdinc.com

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Cara Phillips via iheartphotograph

christinehahn

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IMBOYCRAZY did a “Blind Leading the Blind” post for dudes, some key points that needs some reiterating:

1.  confidence is key! i cannot stress this enough! an unsure, all over the place, topsy turvey, confused, weak dude is not sexy. own your shit muthah-fuckah! know who you are. if you aren’t a master of something, at least be a master at being you! Jesus!

2. be creative when coming up with date ideas. you never know; if planned properly, you could end up at the driving range with a bottle of champagne ormaking out in a park, also with a bottle of champagne! share an epic experience that will make both your lives more interesting!

8. no backhanded compliments as a woo’ing tactic, but sexy sarcasm is great.

12. don’t walk around with your arms crossed. that’s some serious bad body language AND automatically implies you’re a pussy.

Others, I discreetly agree with, but that’s for me to know and you to only speculate. And yes, IMBOYCRAZY is on the York’s Peppermint Patty commercial.

Graceee

]]> http://www.hearandsay.com/eyelove/boi-power/feed/ 0 http://www.hearandsay.com/angstlifeangst/madness/ http://www.hearandsay.com/angstlifeangst/madness/#comments Fri, 30 Apr 2010 07:04:54 +0000 admin http://www.hearandsay.com/?p=677

I want one

There’s always the disclaimer, the Reveille to praising his beautiful, sexual dominance: he’s such an misogynistic a**hole. Yes. This may be true. He’s a hypocrite, a womanizer, a man’s man in a man’s world…but that’s part of the strange, animal attraction.

Those who haven’t seen it– you might assume I’m some raving mad hormonal mess (which might be, but is beside the point)– but this is *nature*. It is *natural* to be attracted to Don Draper. A law heavier than gravity. No, seriously: watch him seduce a woman and come home to a loving family. Moral wars and repulsion to such behavior aside– Don Draper somehow pulls it off and still manages to make me fall in deep, angsty lust. Me, and a whole nation of women.,.

When we study gender issues (which is usually addressing females as the marginalized in a patriarchal society), I feel like there’s the Token No theory that presupposes (lack of) sexual consent (or fatal mis-communication during foreplay), but no one discusses that women also have a double standard. Don’t we? Isn’t that why some of us are attracted to “assholes” but love talking about it (and following through, no less)?

Not to say: inequality between genders is so very inconvenient. There are a strange number of daily phrases or vocabulary that are awkward to use with whomever you’re attracted to, and in this case: females to males. I won’t get into it.

So what is this Don Draper effect? It’s as though I excuse his multitude of sinful indiscretions because he’s a charismatic, physically attractive, tremendously masculine man who can have as many and much as he wants, and acts like it. The smell of his vices– cigarettes and liquor– are his eau de seduction. These are all things I clearly feel but don’t agree with.

I don’t want to marry him, but if he asked me, I would probably say yes.

There’s the constant contradiction. I can’t blame this one on pheromones.

Graceee

Distressed Damsel in Distress

Today’s Mind-thoughts:

I hate to back into gender-debates/man v. woman, because it’s a lot more complicated than utter equality (i.e. What, all that’s diff. is anatomy), seperate spheres (i.e. woman are masters of empathy while men are master…jk!), or… whatever else people can think of. I bring this up because lately, I’ve heard the complaint that men just aren’t as chivalrous anymore.What does this even mean?

chivalry /  ’v()lri/

→ n.
1. the medieval knightly system with its religious, moral, and social code. • the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honour, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help the weak. • courteous behaviour, especially that of a man towards women.
2. (archaic) knights, noblemen, and horsemen collectively.
- DERIVATIVES chivalric adj.
- ORIGIN ME: from OFr. chevalerie, from med. L. caballerius, for late L. caballarius (see chevalier).

“chivalry n.“  The Concise Oxford English Dictionary, Twelfth edition . Ed. Catherine Soanes and Angus Stevenson. Oxford University Press, 2008. Oxford Reference Online. Oxford University Press.  University of Washington.  15 November 2009  <http://www.oxfordreference.com.offcampus.lib.washington.edu/views/ENTRY.html?subview=Main&entry=t23.e9856>

Mr. Darcy v. Elizabeth Bennett

My question is, when was this subconsciously attached to gentlemen-ly behavior: the way a man *should* act?

From what I remember, there was always the variety of men; the kind that were chivalrous, well-spoken, educated, respectful; then we have the mountain men, the rough-edged “bad boys” whose independent, masculine gruffness became an endearing virtue in contrast to those who– excuse my language– “place the pussy on a pedestal”.

That is the first mistake: assuming that once upon a Victorian time, all men were expected to open doors, take off their hats, and stand at attention when a lady enters a room. Maybe it’s because I’m Asian, but the history of respect towards a woman on account of her sex is totally different on the other side of the world. My own mother had to cook and clean for my father’s family on her own wedding night before she had the respective right to sit down and eat her own food. How’s that for the myth of chivalry?

So what are the complaints about? One acquaintance bemoans the loss of chivalry; her friend response with a quote from Dave LaChapelle: “Chivalry is dead, and woman killed it”. Is he saying that woman take too much advantage of men’s kindness?? And from what place is this stance coming from?

Let’s ignore that. Another one of my friends– incidentally, a “dude”– complained that boyfriends are losing touch with being courteous, considerate, and loyal. Driving a girlfriend home instead of making her take the bus home at 10 0′clock at night, for example. Granted, that might just be his own friend being what we call a douche-bag, but other instances– refusing to hang out with a girlfriend’s friends, or the little things like holding doors open (buildings and cars), buying dinner, even the courtesy of not pressuring a girl into sex– can we say these leanings towards these small, social customs of “respecting a woman” have been lost?

The complexity continues because these strange expectations can also be considered as sexist– can a woman not open a door for herself, or is it necessary to stand at attention and stop all business because a vagina has entered the room? Some girls love to be taken care of, protected; this is where the myth of chivalry lies. Their fantasy dreams of medieval knights in shining white armor (which, by way, would look fucking ridiculous) translates to the mentality of a modern-day trophy wife/ gold digger.

So I say: let’s get rid of this subtle lie that seems to elude sobbing girls who dream of being a damsel in distress. While types of relationships that are contingent on the man taking initiative for his lady do exist (Real Housewives of OC/Atlanta/New York City depict some of those unfortunate realities), I feel like the best kind of relationships rely on equal give and take, and love and respect based on personality and character, rather than the differences of their sex. I’d rather hang out with a man that gives everyone equal respect and courtesy, and I do expect the same “chivalry” from woman as much as men.

Graceee

via rushofblood.tumblr

Hello my dear readers. My dear, darling readers.

I awoke to Seattle enshrouded by gentle mist. The breath of Zeus is upon us.

But seriously, I’m so proud of how productive I am today.

What I have completed:
Health screening for Rome. Researched $$$ for vaccinations. Got an official Washington State Issued ID Card. Got a library card at the Seattle Public Library, where I am visiting for the first time.

All before 12:00.

I’ve also scheduled an interview for a story I’m reporting on for my class– COM 495, “SUPRAPRINT” by Professor Florangela Davila.

I would blog on my story, but I sorta don’t– because I’m weary of how many people are actually in Mars Hill Church, and I don’t want to have them “reading me” before I interview them. That’s incredibly self-indulgent of me, to think that I am quite that important for them to be concerned about, but no matter, no matter, self-indulgence comes and goes like the wind.

This is a ridiculous post. Does anyone else create things and destroy them precisely because they don’t have conviction in their coolness??

I have more conviction in others than I do in myself. Why does this sound terrible?

In NEWS: Yes-men front man Andy Bichlbaum pulled a stunt press junket when he impersonated a member of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce and announced that the chamber would reverse their previous stance on global warming policies and instead support taxation of carbon emmissions. He was interrupted by an actual member of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce– see their live hoax here. Hilarity only increases when the “real man” arrives on the scene– and an actual statement from the U.S. Chamber of Commerce was released denouncing the hoax as an obstacle in “seriously discussing the improvement of global climate change in the world” (not a direct quote– just something like that). Losers.

Some things are for sure: these incredible pieces made my jaw drop:

 

via butdoesitfloat.com

 

via butdoesitfloat.com

via butdoesitfloat.com

 Epic pieces for epic day(ze).

Love,

Graceee